Insure there's some tension on the drawbar holding it in place. Also, make sure the hook is bent a full 90 degrees, and maybe even a couple of degrees more. That's usually why they ride up.
If the drawbar is staying pretty much in place and not riding up, I'd be looking for a broken wire under the heatshrink on the drawbar or the tender arm. I've had a number of locomotives with a bad solder joint to the sensor or IR LED that would cause those exact symptoms. If you gently tug on the wires one at a time where they come out while you are powered up, you can see if the communication to the tender breaks down.