Johnny,
As Gilly mentioned, stay with a 16" (length) or smaller car. Anything longer will probably looked a bit goofy.
As far as confusion with the differant "sizes" that are put on items, well, if your new, yes it will take a bit to understand what they relate to.
Standard gauge? I assume you are referring to tinplate(all metal) trains. These are reproductions of all metal trains made back in the early 1900's (1900-1940's), these are refered to as tinplate. Standard gauge would refers to the very large size, almost twice as big as O gauge. Now, to really confuse you, they also made tinplate trains in traditional O gauge size back then.
Most trains made from 1950-1970 are commonly referred to as traditional size O gauge, in addition to producing "traditional" size (which were generally smaller than 1/48 scale), they were made so they could run on very tight curves, as tight as 027 track, customers gradually demanded cars that were closer to a true 1/48 scale, well, some manufacturers did produce some true 1/48 scale items, the problem was they were so big, they would only run on O gauge track that was set up with a minimum of 072 curves. Everyone else couldnt run them, so manufacturers came out with "semi scale" items, which were larger, closer to scale size but a bit smaller, but looked much better than traditional size. Most of these could run on traditional O gauge track of 031curves.
So in the end, it's all a good thing because collectors and operators have the choices they never had before. Some like the smaller traditional size, some like the semi scale size, some only purchase true 1/48 scale engines and cars. Traditional and semi scale can pretty much run on any O gauge track, true 1/48 scale equipment generally will list what diameter track it can operate on. Some "Scale" engines and cars are really huge. When you visit a local hobby shop ask to see the differance, i'm sure they will help explain (hopefully better than I have tried too).
If your using 042, 054 curves, all switchers(12") or maybe a GP38 diesel(15") will look ok, a SD90(over 20" long) would look a bit silly. Even the the SD90 might be able to run on a 042 curve, it most likely would look a bit odd going around such a curve, 072 or larger curves are needed to look decent.
Best advice I have is to find a well stocked train shop that has the items on display so you can see the differance.
Good luck!