Finally!
It's not full "big boy" DCS, it's the DCS Commander or the "HO Digital Commander System Controller" console (HODCSCC). Still it's DCS and it works.
For me it was a three step process:
1) Better wiring. While DCS may prefer star wiring and work very well with bus wiring if done right I'm pretty sure it won't work well with crappy rats nest wiring and cheap hardware store light switches to activate blocks. It took a while but now I have a fairly neat bus wired network with high quality toggle switches.
2) Set up a fully isolated track section (a star with one point). Three feet of track with only one way in and one way out for the DCS signal. That way I could rule out my layout wiring if it was still a problem. Then it would either be the engine or the nitwit pushing the buttons on the console. Turns out it was the latter, so . . .
3) Carefully re-read the instruction manual. In a about 5 minutes I got to the part where I said "oh, wish I had read that sooner". 
After that I took each of the twelve engines in my PS2/PS3 fleet, some new, some pre-owned, some 3v and some 5v PS2's and set each one on the test track. Without fail every engine added or presented a number that I was able to change with the "EDIT" key. I was stunned. On the layout every engine more or less accepted commands at any location on the track, even the "valley of death" section with four Atlas switches in series. The primary benefit to me is awesome; I can control the speed of every engine down to 5 smph or less without jerking or stalling. Other features, although limited vs. full DCS are pretty fun especially push button smoke activation. I can now raise the air quality in my office to the same toxic levels as the air in downtown LA!
Do I want a medal? No. But will accept a DCS merit badge if there is one. 
G